Ever since they announced their engagement on Instagram last December, Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco have essentially become Hollywood’s royal couple. Fans have eagerly awaited news of their impending nuptials, and the couple has been generous, doing quite a few interviews together and about each other.
On the podcast “Table Manners with Jessie and Lennie Ware,” Gomez and Blanco opened up about some of the plans for their big day. Gomez, in particular, discussed her plans for an unconventional first dance.
According to E! NewsGomez told podcast hosts Jessie and Lennie Ware that she doesn’t actually want to have a first dance at her wedding with Blanco, as would be tradition. “I don’t think we’re looking at having one of those. ‘Cause they’re a little …” she said, trailing off. Blanco stepped in to help her out with what she was trying to say, as he said, “She’s shy.”
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Despite this break with tradition, Gomez isn’t eschewing the idea of a first dance altogether. “I am looking forward to a special dance with my papa,” she said. Her papa is her maternal grandfather, the father of Mom Mandy Teefey.
Of her grandfather, she said, “He never got a chance to walk my mom down the aisle because, good for my mom, she decided to go to Vegas and was like, ‘Whooo’ and she’s still been with him (Brian Teefey) ever since she was 26. So it’s very cute that they did that. But I wanted to give my grandfather the opportunity to have that.”
Blanco did point out that Gomez would have to dance with him at some point during the night, as is customary in his Jewish culture. The two will apparently include a Hora at their wedding, in which both are lifted up in chairs. Gomez stated, “I am very nervous about that. I have to be honest, it looks so cute and adorable. But I was like, ‘What, I have to depend on something like this?’ I just gotta have a padding around.”
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We all know about the first dance being a traditional part of wedding receptions, but where do its origins come from? Andrey Stanevthe founder of Ballroom Dance in NYC and a former Bulgarian National Dance Champion, explained the history behind first dances.
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Stanev said that the original concept of a first dance had nothing to do with weddings. Instead, it originated in ballrooms in the 17th century, where the guest of honor at an event would start the festivities with a first dance. “The tradition has evolved over time,” he said, and now takes place at weddings.
“The first dance is a symbolic gesture that represents the couple’s first steps as a married pair,” he continued. “The newlyweds dance together, showing their love and starting their life together.”
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Gomez will not be alone in skipping a first dance at her wedding. Jon Stephens of Seventh Seconda group of wedding musicians based in the U.K., said in a blog post that more couples choose not to have a first dance every year. In 2019, Stephens calculated that 72% of the couples who booked them had a first dance. In 2022, that number shrank to 65%, a trend they expected to continue.
It’s important for each couple to make their wedding feel like it is truly their own. It is, after all, a very special day that they will remember for the rest of their lives.
Instead of blindly following every tradition and fitting as much as humanly possible into the event, it’s much better to pick what is most important to them. For some couples, like Gomez and Blanco, that simply won’t include a first dance.
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Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.