Working in a restaurant can be a rewarding experience, but it’s largely dependent on customers’ behavior. Anyone who has worked in the service industry has a keen eye for troublesome customers, and they’re often able to spot them before even approaching the table. Restaurant servers took to Reddit to share exactly what they look out for and the surefire signs that a patron is going to be a problem, or worse, just a bad customer.
From constant complaints to a litany of substitutions, service with a smile isn’t always easy, depending on who is doing the ordering. When tips are on the line, however, servers will keep quiet even though they know that certain behaviors spell trouble. It’s all part of the job, unfortunately.
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Not a behavior you’d readily think of, but the top commenter simply stated, “When the first words out of their mouth are Diet Coke and they say it right when I try to say my first word.” That’s definitely not a friendly attitude; in fact, it’s actually quite rude.
Servers are doing a job, and they are handling your food; it seems like kindness would be a good move. Servers in the comments explained that customers often ask for something before the conversation even starts. Before the server can ask how they’re doing or if they can bring something to the table. That doesn’t exactly set the tone.
If you think it’s normal to interrupt a server before they get to say something just to ask for a drink, maybe think again. It’s basic courtesy. Career advisor Marty Nemko wrote that when you interrupt someone speaking, you appear rude, egotistical, and uncontrolled. So when somebody does that to a server, there’s a good chance the worker is attributing adjectives like those to the customer.
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A server commented that there’s a certain look people have that just makes it clear they want to start complaining. “The AC vent is too close to them,” they wrote. “The table next to theirs is dirty. The light is too bright. The light is too dim. They are offended that they can smell the food cooking.” It’s almost as if, no matter how much effort the restaurant crew puts in, the customer will find a problem.
Psychotherapist Ilene Strauss Cohen explained that chronic complainers overfocus on negative emotions such as frustration and anger, which can change the way they think. She argued that the reinforcements of such thoughts rewire your neurotransmitters, which are what send chemicals to communicate with your body.
Basically, if someone is a complainer, they are going to complain. It doesn’t matter if the entire experience is perfect from start to finish. Their thoughts revolve around the negative, and they will express them at every opportunity.
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Servers can just tell that the customers are going to be a problem when they’re not reading what’s in front of them. A worker shared their annoyance when people start asking questions like, “What do you guys have?” or “How much is this dish?” It’s as if there isn’t a menu on the table with all of that information. If people have questions about what’s written on the menu, then yes, they should ask the server, but they should read it before asking.
One important counterargument, though, is that some people might just have difficulty reading menus. Chu Vision Institute, an eye procedure practice in Minnesota, explained that oftentimes, your vision may weaken without you noticing. They wrote that between the ages of 40 and 65, people’s reading vision worsens as the eyes lose some of their ability to focus. So if a customer ignores the menu and starts asking a server about it, maybe they’re annoying, or maybe they just can’t read the tiny letters.
Look, being a server is a hard job. If you enjoy the restaurant experience, you should want to make your interaction with the staff as seamless and pleasant as possible. If you behave properly, you’ll likely have an amazing time. Sure, if something really deserves complaining about, you should mention it. And of course, if you have a legit question about the menu, go ahead and ask. But be kind. If your servers are happy, chances are you’ll walk away from the meal smiling, too.
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Matt Machado is a writer studying journalism at the University of Central Florida. He covers relationships, psychology, celebrities, pop culture, and human interest topics.
