In a world where marks, ranks, and report cards seem to define a student’s worth, it’s easy to forget what real success actually means. Today’s kids are growing up in a pressure-filled environment where comparison is constant—whether it’s board exam scores, college choices, sports achievements, or even Instagram likes. Somewhere along the way, learning stopped being joyful and turned into a race. And the truth is, many students silently struggle with anxiety, self-doubt, and the fear of not being “enough.”

But success isn’t a number on a sheet of paper, says Dr. Sachu Ramalingam, Head of Centre of Well-Being, Lighthouse Learning. Real success is about who you become, not just what you achieve, believes the expert as she shares why students do not feel enough these days and what needs to be changed.

How do you define true student success beyond grades and academic performance?
True student success goes far beyond marks or medals. It’s about developing curiosity, confidence, and compassion and kindness. A truly successful student is someone who learns how to think, not just what to think but someone who can adapt, collaborate, and contribute meaningfully to society. Success should be measured in self-growth, emotional maturity, and the ability to find joy in learning, not just in achieving.

Many students struggle with comparison and pressure. What advice would you give them on defining success for themselves?
Comparison is the quickest way to lose sight of your own journey. Each student has a different pace, background, and strength and that’s what makes them unique. Instead of comparing yourself to others, compare who you are today with who you were yesterday. Define success as progress, not perfection. Ask yourself: Am I learning? Am I growing? Am I becoming a kinder version of myself? That's success worth chasing.

What are the biggest mental health challenges you see among young people today?
The biggest challenges are anxiety, self-doubt, lack of resilience, entitlement and the constant need for validation often amplified by social media and academic expectations. Many young people feel they must be “perfect” in everything. This creates burnout and loneliness. Others who feel entitled feel with parents money, everything can be bought. What we need is open conversations around emotions, more emphasis on rest and hobbies, and creating safe spaces where children can express themselves without fear of judgment. Also parents need to have parenting styles with emphasis on values and inner principles.

How can we help children and teens handle failure in a healthy, growth-oriented way?
Failure should be treated as feedback, not a verdict. Adults, parents and teachers play a crucial role here. When children fail, instead of asking “Why didn’t you do better? we should ask “What did you learn?” This shift helps them see failure as part of learning, not as a reflection of their worth. Encouraging small risks, celebrating effort, and modeling resilience ourselves can make a huge difference.

What small, everyday practices can help students build emotional resilience?

• Keep a gratitude journal and write three things you’re thankful for daily.
• Spend 20–30 minutes outdoors or away from screens.
• Practice mindfulness or deep breathing before stressful moments.
• Talk about your feelings with someone you trust.
• Celebrate small wins even when completing homework on time counts.
• Over time, these habits build mental strength and emotional balance.
• Being in nature and reflecting.
• Serving the needy and doing one thing to uplift the community.

What message would you give to a student who feels “not enough” compared to their peers?You are enough not because of what you achieve, but because of who you are. Everyone’s path unfolds differently. The friend who seems ahead of you today might be learning lessons you’ve already mastered in another form. Don’t measure your worth with someone else’s yardstick. Focus on your journey; it's valid, valuable, and uniquely yours.

What’s one piece of wisdom you’d want every student to carry with them for life?
Your marks will fade from memory, but your mindset will shape your destiny. Learn to stay curious, be kind, and never stop growing. Life isn’t a race, it's a journey of self-discovery. The more you learn about yourself, the more successful you’ll truly become.