A first-time babysitter is reconsidering working with children after dealing with a terribly behaved 11-year-old girl. In a since-deleted postthe 21-year-old took to Reddit to vent about the horror story of babysitting nights with the girl, culminating with a recent incident involving their “violent” cat.
Unsure how to navigate the situation and even considering “firing” the family, she’s asking for advice. “I’ve always been told that I’m good with kids… everything always went well,” she wrote. “(This girl) refuses everything and gets defensive.”
Managing children, whether you’re a full-time nanny, teacher, or babysitter, is no easy task. Sometimes, even the bare minimum, like getting them to eat or take a bath, is the hardest part of the day. Especially with rising mental health issues, attention span deficits, and screen time addictions, childcare jobs are only getting harder.
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“I was just following the schedule that her parents gave me,” she wrote. “No lunch on time…Reading time, no. Going outside, no. Refuses to wear bug spray or sunscreen.”
In addition to battling about other things on the schedule, she said screen time has been a huge issue and something that her parents are adamant about managing. “(They) limited her to one hour of screen time, but she watched TV for 3 straight hours …She only does things when she wants to, asks for lunch when she feels like it, and asks for things in the rudest way.”
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In an effort to keep the peace, the babysitter said she “says yes to most things… even making her special snacks,” all in an effort to bond with the tween.
Overwhelmed by her lack of respect, she feels desperate and dreads her next shift for the family.
“This is my first time babysitting for pay, and for complete strangers. I didn’t know that I’d be so intimidated and let so many things pass. I definitely was a lot more firm when I wasn’t paid and watching kids whose parents knew mine.”
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Clearly, there’s more to this situation than this woman’s babysitting skills, and many commenters urged her to have a conversation with the girl’s parents.
Whether it’s resentment towards her parents’ absence or mental health struggles, they need to give their babysitter the tools and information that allow her to perform her job properly.
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From locking herself in the basement to calling her babysitter names and refusing to follow any instructions, she said watching the girl has become physically and emotionally draining.
“She always tries to throw her cat on my face, knowing that it’s violent,” she wrote. “I feel bad because she’s a couch potato most of the time, and that’s not what her parents asked me to do… She’s only nice when her parents are home.”
Unsure of how to move forward, especially feeling unheard and unsafe alone with the girl, she asked Redditors to share advice. “I don’t know if there’s anything I’m doing wrong or if this family isn’t worth trying for.”
While many nannies and babysitters say they’ve figured out how to discipline and “parent” misbehaving children, they admit it’s a delicate balance that often takes a long time to perfect.
“You should always talk with parents beforehand… about their preferred style of parenting and discipline,” a nanny named Lily Grace on TikTok said.
Especially if this babysitter is already months into watching this young girl, she needs to reassess boundaries and her presence as an authority figure when her parents aren’t around. That starts with open communication.
Of course, she wields the autonomy to “fire” this family whenever she chooses to, but learning how to navigate this situation with the parents could be incredibly helpful for future jobs. “Talk to the parents, maybe even suggest behavioral therapy,” one commenter wrote. “Unsafe behavior should never be tolerated.”
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Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News & Entertainment Writer at YourTango who focuses on health & wellness, social policy, and human interest stories
