Fame and fortune, at one time or another, we’ve all dreamed of gracing the stage or silver screen, right? Depending on how you were raised, that actually might not be the case. There are some kids who grow up so emotionally sound that they are perfectly content without dreams of becoming a celebrity.

If your children dream of being in the spotlight, British author and philosopher Alain De Botton has some questions about your parenting.

The non-fiction author claimed that children with good parents never want to be famous.

During a podcast episode of “20VC with Harry Stebbings,” Botton explained why those with the best parents rarely seek a life in the public eye.

“A marker of good parenting is that your child doesn’t have any wish to be famous,” he insisted. “It means that they have an internal system of validation rather than an external system of validation.”

They are not looking for the public validation that celebrities receive because they don’t need it to feel happy or accomplished.

“They are not seeking to be known by strangers. They can be content to be known by a small circle of people that they actually know back,” Button added. “So it’s two-way rather than a broadcast system.”

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Children who grew up with a sense of pride in their own accomplishments are less likely to dream of a career in the limelight.

In this case, “good parents” are those who instill confidence in their children from a young age and teach them to find validation within themselves — something that is a challenge for many adults.

Mory Fontanez, an intuitive life coach, told Scary Mommy that when a child does something momentous — whether they scored a goal in soccer, brought home a good grade, or landed a role in the school play — parents should curb the initial instinct to praise their kid.

“Immediately say — you must be so proud of yourself,” she advised. “This instills that their opinion of themselves is what matters more, way more, than my opinion.”

This, along with working on self-confidence, prevents children from developing an addiction to validation — one that might lead to dreams of fame and fortune.

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That is not to say that all famous people were raised by bad parents.

From a young age, some kids have an immediate passion for singing, acting, dancing, athletics, or other hobbies that eventually land them in Hollywood.

Parents don’t have to shut these interests down — it’s OK to encourage children to pursue their dreams, even ones that may lead to fame.

Selena Gomez, Bradley Cooper, and Zendaya are just a few of the many Hollywood stars who are close with their parents and they’re as famous as you can get! They likely consider their parents to be good.

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Of course, many celebrities, from Drew Barrymore to Lindsay Lohan, had far less active parents or ones that pushed them into the limelight.

Ultimately, being a “good parent” is not predicated on keeping your children away from fame. It’s about cheering them on from the sidelines, supporting them in their self-discovery journeys, and instilling the confidence in them that will propel them to do anything they set their minds to — whether they become a doctor, a writer, or a famous Hollywood movie star.

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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.