Nobody is attracted to someone who’s always available—where’s the excitement in that? As much as you may want to spend every moment with your partner, being overly available can backfire, especially when the effort isn’t mutual.

Thankfully, this pattern is easy to spot. There are plenty of clear signs that you’re giving too much of your time and energy. If you want the relationship to thrive, it’s time to recognize these habits and change them—fast.

# You say “yes” to everything

If you constantly agree to whatever your partner suggests, it’s a red flag. Don’t you have your own plans or preferences? It’s okay to skip an outing and choose a quiet night in instead of forcing yourself to go along with something you don’t even enjoy.

# You reply instantly to every call or text

Answering messages while you’re busy—showering, at the dentist, or in the middle of something important—signals over-availability. Quick replies are fine when you’re free, but interrupting real life just to respond isn’t healthy.

# You apologize for missed calls or texts

If you immediately explain and apologize for missing a call because you were in a meeting or napping, it can come across as needy. A simple, casual response like, “Hey, what’s up?” shows confidence and independence.

# You start most of the conversations

Texting multiple times a day and constantly checking in can feel excessive. If you’re genuinely busy and fulfilled, nonstop messaging shouldn’t be your norm.

# You agree to last-minute plans

When your partner calls at the last second and you drop everything—even plans you were excited about—it shows you’re always on standby. That kind of flexibility shouldn’t be expected all the time.

# You’re okay with last-minute cancellations

If your partner cancels plans at the last minute and you instantly respond with “No worries!” every time, you’re teaching them that your time isn’t valuable. Being understanding doesn’t mean accepting disrespect.

# You cancel plans with friends for your partner

Dropping friends whenever your partner wants to meet is a major sign of being too available. Saying no occasionally isn’t rude—it’s healthy.

# You avoid making plans just in case they’re free

Turning down invitations because your partner might want to do something later puts your life on pause for someone else. Waiting around like that often leads to disappointment.

# You claim you’re “not busy” when you actually are

Pretending to be free so your partner will make plans isn’t better than being too available—it’s just hiding it. Your time and commitments matter.

# Your friends point it out

If your friends are telling you that you’re always prioritizing your partner over them, listen. They’re seeing what you might be ignoring.