We seem to be in a heyday of unique baby names, from unearthed classics like Edith and Henry to … well downright weird concoctions made up of entirely too many vowels.
According to a survey conducted by the website BabyCenter, a lot of parents are having second thoughts about all those “-eigh” spellings and offbeat monikers.
BabyCenter is a website that provides references and information for new and soon-to-be parents on everything from childcare to, yes, picking a baby name. They recently decided to dig into how this whole unique baby name trend is actually going.
It’s one thing to go viral on social media for naming your kid Arson or Julep — two actual names given to actual American babies in 2023. It’s quite another to have to look at your child every day for the rest of your life and think, “I actually named my child Arson.”
It’s perhaps unsurprising then that BabyCenter found a whole lot of parents regret what they’ve named their kid.
“Every time someone calls her by her name, I can’t help but cringe,” one mom who named her baby Cleo told BabyCenter. “I just want to cry because I don’t know what to do.”
Honestly, I think Cleo is kind of cute. It reminds me of the ’90s TV psychic icon Miss Cleo, which is a high honor. Still, it’s not for everyone, and this mom is not alone. BabyCenter found that 1 in 10 moms wish they’d named their kid something else.
: Why I Seriously Regret My Child’s Name
An even higher number of parents said that while they don’t necessarily regret the name they gave their kid, they’re also not using it. A full 20% of respondents told BabyCenter they prefer their kid’s nickname, and 15% said they prefer their child’s middle name.
Elizaveta Galitckaia | Shutterstock
This frankly makes you wonder why they didn’t just choose those names in the first place. My parents decided to call me JP after feeling like John was entirely too grown up for a fat little bald-headed baby, which is fair enough — but why name me that in the first place, then?! And JP? “Jack” was literally RIGHT THERE.
Anyway, the parents BabyCenter spoke to had similar dilemmas. Like my mom and dad, 10% felt the name they’d chosen was a “mismatch between the name and the personality” that “doesn’t suit their child’s real-life attitude and mannerisms.”
But sadly, an even higher number, 15%, said they don’t like their kid’s name because of either mockery or other people’s opinions. Now is a great time to remind everyone that when someone shares their baby’s name with you, the only appropriate response is to smile and congratulate them — yes, even if it’s a situation like that one Australian lady who named her kid Methamphetamine Rules.
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Thankfully, the problem of hating your baby’s name tends to go away with time. BabyCenter found that while more than 1 in 5 parents feel regret about their kid’s name within the first year of their life, only 6% take on a long-term hatred of little Kush or Havoc — two more actual names given to actual American babies in 2023, God help us all.
It’s important, however, to act fast if you truly can’t live with the incredibly stupid — er, sorry, misaligned name you gave your kid. Child development experts say that kids start to recognize their names at about six months old, and it impacts their cognitive development.
By the same token, though, research by renowned psychologist Jean Twenge found that “the name becomes a symbol of the self,” and when a person feels discomfort over their name — say because they’re bullied for it or because their parents named them Ruckus, another actual name given to an actual American baby in 2023 — it is cor with poor psychological health.
All that to say: Choose wisely, choose carefully, and change early if you need to. But most likely, you’ll get past your discomfort with your baby’s name pretty quickly, and all will be well with little Bryîtneigh. Unless, of course, you named your child Cartel, an actual name — well, you get the picture.
: New Mom & Dad ‘Stunned’ By Their Family’s ‘Unhinged’ Response To Their Baby’s Name
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice, and human interest topics.