But this interstellar land grab raises other important questions.

It has been rumoured that (aka DOUCHE) had considered setting up a Guantanamo Bay type of facility there for deporting illegal migrants.

But someone pointed out that with 2.29 million potential Indian deportees, Mars could soon become a or a , and so the idea was dropped.

Instead, since refuses to play ball or catch-the-grenade in , the Jared Kushner idea of would be shifted to Mars and the world's billionaires invited to move to its unpolluted, land-mine free, unbombed environs, the 52nd state of the USA.

Considering the success of Trump's Gold Card offer (1,000 were sold on the first day at USD 1 million each, we learn), a similar model could be followed, with a USD 10 million price tag, perhaps.

Since only SpaceX rockets would be used, Musk would get half of the revenues, with which he could shore up plummeting share prices and pay the alimony to the additional half a dozen wives he would have acquired by then.

Going by Space X's current record, about 40 per cent of the space ships would blow up in space along with their occupants — but there would be no refunds since space has neither any gravity, nor any expiry date.

So, who would comprise this 1 million ? Not many Americans, I predict, because by then they would all have been reduced to penury under Trump's policy and would be unable to pay for the ticket.

and may want to go, but could face arrest under the warrants when they land on Mars, so they are unlikely to apply.

Many from the South Pacific — Tonga, Vanuatu, Fiji — would be interested, since by then, their islands would be drowning in the rising sea levels. Unfortunately, they wouldn't have enough seashells to pay for the tickets.

But by far the biggest catchment area would be India, which by then would have a of USD 35 trillion, according to our ministers, and about a thousand billionaires and a million Ultra-HNI's as a consequence of the programmes.

Since roughly 40 per cent of our GDP is siphoned off to make these billionaires and another 25 per cent is taken abroad by the thousands of millionaires who take foreign citizenship every year, there should be no shortage of applicants from India.

There would be no ED, CBI, FCRA, Interpol or extradition rules on Mars, the only rule being .

There would also be no political parties or judges to ‘voluntarily’ donate money to.

I believe — where else? — have already sent feelers to Musk to check whether dhokla will be served on the flight.

There should be a good chance of that, I should think, since the airport contract on Mars will probably be awarded to the once all Indian import duties are removed on Tesla : Musk can make rockets but not dhokla, you see.

But one problem still has to be sorted out by the new sheriff in town...

There exists an international treaty on the sharing of the Antarctic for research purposes, I learn, but none for Mars.

So the USA will lay claim to it, based on the oldest covenant of all: ‘Finder's keepers.’

Plus, Trump is likely to demand the planet as compensation for America having been left out of the first wave of global colonisation in the 18th and 19th centuries, when England, France, Portugal, Spain and Belgium had carved out the world amongst themselves like a Thanksgiving turkey.

Well, that particular chicken has now come home to roost — on Mars.

It's COLAnisation time again, folks!

Advance bookings for the condos, I believe, will begin on the day that Mr Drumpf is sworn in as President for the third time, with Vice President Musketeer looking on.

Looks like Gurgaon and DLF will finally get some competition.

Views are personal.

Avay Shukla is a retired IAS officer and author of Disappearing Democracy: Dismantling of a Nation and other works. He blogs at avayshukla.blogspot.com.

More of his writing may be read .